Saturday, 3 January 2015

Urdu Jokes - Part 7

Aik Pathan dost ke ghar se apne ghar jane laga lekin bahir barish thi to dost ne kaha ke aj mere pas ruk jao kio ke barish bahut taiz hai. Pathan ne kaha thik hai, aj me ap ke pas rahu ga. Dost ne us ke li'ye bistra bichaiya. Aur dost ne Pathan ko awaz di lekin Pathan ghaib tha. Aik ghante ke bad wapis aya to us ke kapre geele the. Dost ne pucha ke kaha gya tha to Pathan ne jawab dete huwe kaha ke me ghar btane gya tha ke aj barish bahut taiz hai aur me dost ke pas rahu ga.

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Wife: Soch rahi hun ke ap ke sath Dubai, UK ghoom aon, kitne paise lage gain?
Husband: Kuch bhi nahin.
Wife: Hiran ho kar, wo kiase?
Husband: Sochne ke paise nahi lagte.

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Teacher: Jis ko sunaai na de use English me kya kehte hain?
Students: Jo marzi keh lo us kanjar ko phir bhi sunaai nahi de ga.

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Judge: Suna hai ke pichle 10 sal se tum ne apni biwi ko dara dhamka ke rakha hai.
Admi: Dar kar bola, wo, wo, wo janab...
Judge: Safai ki zarurat nahi, bus tariqa btao tariqa.

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Faqeer 1 Pathan ke ghar aya aur kaha ke main Allah ka mehman hun.
Pathan uska hath pakar kar usko masjid may le gya aur kaha ke ye uska ghar hai ap to ghalti se hamare ghar aa ge the.

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1 Jungli apni family ke sath jungle me rehta tha. 1 din use jungle se 1 sheesha mila. Wo samja ke ye us ke bap ki taswir hai. Wo use apne ghar le gya aur us se roz batain karne laga. Uski biwi ko shak huwa.
Aik din shohar ki ghair mojudgi me us ne sheesha nikala aur apna aks dekh kar boli. Acha to ye hai wo kalay mun wali, jis se mera shohar roz batain karta hai. Us ne sheesha apni 70 saal ki buri saas ko dikhaiya to saas boli, "churail ki umar dekho aur kartoot dekho."

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Biwi: Aj koi aisi bat kaho ke main khush bhi ho jaon aur jal bhi jaon.
Shohar: Tum meri zindagi ho aur aisi zindagi par lanat hai.

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Saas: Aaj meri beti itni khamosh kio bethi hai.
Damaad: Dar-asal light gayi huwi thi to us ne muj se lipstick mangi to main ne elfi de di. Shayad isi waja se naraz hai.

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Pagal ne pagal ki jan bachai. Doctor ne use office bulaya aur kaha ke tum ne us pagal ko pani ke talaab se nikal kar ye sabit kiya hai ke tum pagal nahi balke normal ho. Lekin afsos ke aj subha us ne rassi se latak kar khudkushi kar li hai. Pagal ne hanste huwe kaha ke wo to main ne use sookhane ke liye latkaya tha.

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BIG-3
1: Wasim Akram's wife (Australia)
2: Imran Khan's wife (England)
3: Shoaib Malik's wife (India)
Log kehte hain Pakistan BIG-3 ke khilaf hai. BIG-3 to Pakistan ka susral hai.

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